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My Little Goblin

 My Little Goblin (it needs a name) #namingmygoblin
Last night we were watching a reality program (I KNOW :) - we may need to get out of the house)!
Couples were asked to identify 5 negative character traits in their partners. Given a list of 15 each individual had to identify 5 within themselves which their partners then had to guess 5 out of the 15 correctly. 
It was amazing to see how many of them got it right, and how easily! The problem came in the one or two times when the partners got them wrong - being called jealous or moody suddenly became a problem... 
So experiment time - with no pool of 15 (so making it a little harder) -  just off the top of our heads, Chris and I each named 5 negative character traits of mine... time to compare :
Mine                                          Chris
                 - Controlling                               - Controlling            
    - Stubborn                                 - Stubborn 
- Quick to React                          - Abrupt
             - Perfectionist                             - Over Committed
- Bad Listener                             - Moody 
I am such an optimist and think of everything in the positive, I over trust and have faith in everything - which can sometimes be a negative thing, but its the way I prefer to live my life, rather than the opposite :)! So these are all FIXABLE, horray!
It seems so easy to identify the negatives in ourselves, one, two, three, four, five and there my list was! We don't get easily upset by them either - but what is actually important is what others (especially those closest to us) see as our negative traits. Relationships are so important and special, and while I don't think any are perfect, refining our actions and decisions to move away from these negative traits is what helps us to evolve, grow stronger and become closer & more loving. 
Chris and I basically chose 3 very similar traits out of the 5, but the 2 that were different, where very different! I called my self a perfectionist while he see's it as being over committed. I said bad at listening and that a lot easier to fix then moody :). Nevertheless - being honest and truthful was what the experiment was about and now I have some new things to work on :)! 
Kahuna reminds us about LOVE! 
My Kahuna journey has given me time and space to reflect on myself, and whilst I feel much more balanced and in sync internally, I still have a lot to work on on the outside. I am far from perfect but reminding myself to guide my decisions and actions with my heart rather then just my head has made a difference to the person I am. Its about teaching my body to love, breathe and flow with life, this would in turn get rid of moody, stubborn, controlling and abrupt Jenna - sounds easy, haha :)! 
I still make mistakes, I snap, I get grumpy and I sometimes scream and shout before I remember to listen! What is important is that I am now aware of this and each day I work on internalizing it! Each time I make one of these mistakes or see one of these traits come out, I remind myself to be aware and work on and live a life that is lead by love... 
In time it comes, growing slowly but surely ... the love is there - its about remembering to use it <3
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